LeChuck sat in his captain's quarters at his desk
writing down estimates and calculations of the amount of treasure he had in his
treasure hold, when suddenly, his first mate burst through the door.
It was a short annoying little man named Largo
"Captain! We're coming up to Melee Island,
we'll be at port in about ten or fifteen minutes!" said Largo.
LeChuck got up out of his seat and smiled,
"Alas, Largo, we have nearly ONE MILLION pieces o' eight! Enough to buy a
whole pile o' flowers for my sweat Elaine. Oh, Elaine how I pine for every
moment of love from your dear sweat lips and your great eyes looking into me as
if I am the king o' the world! Har har har! I would die fer thee if ye told me
to, and I would…"
"Alright, cap, I'll go manage the
docking," said Largo quickly and left. He knew how the captain got when he
thought of returning to Melee Island to see his 'love'. Largo didn't even know
why LeChuck wasted his time with her still…it was just that she plainly hated
his guts, and LeChuck still fell for her.
Anyway, the ship came into port and docked and
everything, and the pirates went to the bar…SCUMM Bar, except LeChuck, he
headed for the mansion.
He walked past the bar and into the Melee
village. He walked past the houses and stores and the people who lived there and
were walking the twisting streets. As LeChuck walked under the clock arch, he
spotted the word STORE on a sign hanging in front of a building. He walked in.
It was a quaint little store, with equipment for
pirates and the like. In one of the corners sat a huge pile of flowers.
"Ah! Flowers fer me dear sweat Elaine!"
he exclaimed as he walked over to them and picked out a whole bunch of bundles.
They were dying and there were flies flying around them like crazy, but LeChuck
didn't care, he couldn't stop thinking about Elaine.
He walked over to the storekeeper behind the
"Ahoy there fancy pants! Long time no see,
ye lil' bugger. Not since the time you stole that sword and shovel from me
claimin' that yer had to borrow them to use fer the three trials!"
exclaimed the storekeeper.
"Aye, matey, that was a long time ago. Now,
let me buy these'm flowers, eh," replied LeChuck. The storekeeper gave him
a funny look but LeChuck ignored it as he forked out a lot o' money for the
storekeeper. With his arms full, LeChuck walked out of the store and down the
street to where another arch began a path out across the cliffs to a mansion out
a little ways. It was the Marley mansion, where Elaine lived.
LeChuck quickened his pace up towards the door as
he got closer and closer. His arms began to get tired from the heavy weight of
the ugly flowers. To LeChuck, the flowers were pretty and smelled great. But
they were really just a bunch of dead venus flytraps, brown with age and
drooping down as they slowly withered into a tight bud of sadness. Pirates think
anything is beautiful, and any pirate would be stupid enough to buy a lovely
girl some ugly dead venus flytraps.
He walked up to the door and knocked.
Elaine's father opened the door and looked at
LeChuck with anger.
"LeChuck, how many times do I have to tell
you, she doesn't feel this way about you," said Mr. Marley.
"Er, sorry sir. I just can't stop thinkin'
of her sweat lips and tender body. Let me give these beautiful flowers to me
pretty Elaine!" replied LeChuck.
Mr. Marley's faced dropped when he looked at the
dead, dry, brown venus flytraps that LeChuck held. Then he smiled; this would be
very funny indeed.
"Elaine!" Mr. Marley called into the
mansion, "Someone here to see you!"
An answer came from inside, "Father! If its
LeChuck, tell him to go jump in the lake and DROWN!"
LeChuck's face went red as he saw Elaine walk
across the living room and stopped ten feet from the door and stared at LeChuck
with anger. She stared at the venus flytraps in LeChuck's arms and yelled,
"You bastard! I told you to never come here again…"
"My sweat plunder bunny!" exclaimed
LeChuck, walking into the mansion and up to Elaine. "Argh! I bought these
flowers to resemble your pretty eyes and your elegant style, baby." He
handed the flytraps to Elaine and she made a disgusted look and looked at her
father. He was laughing at LeChuck from behind.
"No thanks," replied Elaine handing the
flowers back to LeChuck.
Elaine's father walked over to Elaine's side and
stood there. Then he said, "LeChuck, I think its time for you to go."
"Alas, sir, I must give my sweat Elaine a
goodbye kiss before I go out to the pirating world," said LeChuck, and he
leaned forward to kiss Elaine.
She ducked and LeChuck missed her lips and kissed
Mr. Marley instead.
"LECHUCK! GET OUT, NOW!" yelled Mr.
Marley. He punched LeChuck in the face and pushed him to the door, where LeChuck
bolted out the door and away from the mansion as the door slammed shut.
"Whew! That was a close one," sighed
LeChuck. He was all alone now, his crew somewhere out drinking grog and passing
out in stupid drunken states of mind as he stood here sad because of Elaine's
father throwing him out in front of Elaine. 'I'll prove my worth to her! Ye'll
see!' thought LeChuck.
A few hours later, LeChuck watched as the stars
dotted the sky over the rolling sea as the tide came in. He sighed and decided
to go to SCUMM Bar and maybe get a few drinks.
He arrived at SCUMM Bar a few minutes later and
he entered the small building. Pirates from all over crowded the small grog
tavern. Largo stood on a table dancing stupidly and taking off his pants in
front of everybody.
LeChuck ignored the drunken Largo and walked over
to an empty chair beside a tough looking pirate.
"Ahoy matey," said LeChuck, "Is
this spot takin'?"
"Aye, sir. This be me brothers spot,"
replied the pirate. LeChuck sighed, "Better find me another spot
then." He walked over to another empty chair, but before he even asked to
sit down he was waved off a secondtime.
Finally, he went over to the table that Largo was
stripping on and tried to sit in another empty chair but another pirate grabbed
his arm and pulled him away.
"That is my chair, ye scurvy lubber!"
the pirate bellowed.
"Ye snooze, ye loose, sucker. HAR! HAR! HAR!"
The pirate growled and reached for his
sword…LeChuck grabbed his own sword first and sliced off the man's arm. It
fell to the floor with a thud and the pirate ran out of the bar and out into the
"Noone bother me," yelled LeChuck at
everyone in the bar, all looking at him. "I'm in a bad mood right
now." LeChuck sat down and ordered grog from the bartender as he passed by
into the kitchen.
LeChuck sat at the bar late into the night and
when he finally felt tired, he left to his ship for a sleep. As he walked along
the board docks, he spotted something glinting in the water by the dock. He
leapt and reached down to pick it up. It was a huge diamond ring glowing in the
LeChuck smiled and chuckled. "Elaine will
appreciate this!" He bolted up the docks again and past the SCUMM Bar into
A few minutes later, he was standing at the
Marley Mansion door once again. He knocked and Elaine answered.
She exclaimed with anger, "How many times do
I have to tell you LeChuck! I just don't feel that way about you!" She
raised her fist to punch him but he raised the diamond into her face.
She couldn't take her eyes off it, it was so
Har! LeChuck thought, 'She's mine now!' Just as
she was going to grab it, Mr. Marley walked into the mansion lobby.
A few minutes later…
LeChuck lay sprawled on his back on the path
leading to the town. Mr. Marley had beaten him and thrown him on the path to
leave. LeChuck was getting really angry now. He needed to get to Elaine
and…well, love her.
"I'll prove my worth to her if it’s the
last thing I do!" LeChuck said to himself. He got up and headed to town.
As he walked into the village, he saw the
storekeeper's sign and stopped in front of it. He suddenly had and idea! He
would find a mystery or a dangerous place in the Caribbean and he would sail to
He walked in and was greeted by the storekeeper
"Ahoy there fancy pants!" the
storekeeper said. LeChuck walked over to him.
"Excuse me storekeeper, but are there any
sacred or deadly places in the Caribbean that no one has ever returned
from?" asked LeChuck.
"Of course!" replied the storekeeper,
"There's the Secret of Bulky Island, The Secret of Tanga Island, The Secret
"Which mystery is the most deadly and
hidden?" bellowed LeChuck.
The storekeeper smiled, "Why, the legendary
Secret of Monkey Island of course!"
"Monkey Island?" LeChuck thought for a
minute. "Where is it?"
"Legend has it that it is a great distance
east from here, and lies within a voodoo realm different from our reality, or
something like that, I don't really know," replied the storekeeper.
"Well, thanks anyway, old man!" LeChuck
turned and walked out of the store and walked up towards the Marley Mansion once
He stood in front of the door and knocked for the
third time tonight.
Elaine answered again.
"LECHUCK! DON'T EVER COME HERE AGAIN!"
LeChuck said, "Elaine, please let me prove
me worth to ye. I'm settin' off to find the Secret of Monkey Island fer
Elaine was furious, "LeChuck, DROP DEAD!
Literally!" She slammed the door in LeChuck's face.
"Fine then!" LeChuck yelled at the
closed door, hoping that Elaine could hear him, "I just might!"
turned and walked towards Melee Village again, intent on truly finding the
Secret of Monkey Island…and proving his worth to Elaine!