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Chapter 3: One Just Aint Enough for St. Pete
So after I left I had decided to do the sword thing. So I realized I needed a sword. “Well back to that miserable store again!” That being said I walk back to the store still thinking about the complaining guy in there him yelling “I HATE THIS JOB” and “THOSE STUPID PIRATE GUYS DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THEY WERE TALKIN ABOUT” and “HEY, GET BACK HERE! YOU DIDN’T PAY FOR THAT!” I walked through that god fer sakin squeaking door. I opened the door a bit and said to the person I thought was inside “Uh excuse me?” I pushed it open the rest of the way to reveal that I had been talking to thin air the was no one there. I sighed a long heavy sigh of relief.
I walked in noticing a vault and a door behind the counter with the sign ‘Enter And Feel Extreme pain and/ or Death’. I walked past the miscellaneous objects thrown onto display shelves. I saw two swords there one had a display tag on it that read ‘Sword In The Stone. Great for parties and mystical ceremonies to pick the future king of England’, what ever that was, the other was the ‘Non-stone’ model. So I picked that one up and put the money on the desk trying not to ring the bell in hopes that the guy was sleeping in the back. I walked out of the shop as quietly as I could. The inspector was sleeping outside the jailhouse. I walked past to a vacant field. I gazed at it in amazement. It was just beautiful. It reminded me of the plain where my fathers mansion was built. Now being as it was that my father was the Governor when he died I would get the job under my choice. I knew where my mansion was to be built. Right here on this strip of land. I raise my children in it and possibly my grandchildren.
I stopped thinking about that because the image of a guy brushing his hair flashed through my head. I walked back through town and noticed a sign on one of the bridges that said something about control classes for sword users. Under it it listed some of the teachers like ‘Captain MattaU, Wassa’ ‘Falk Macoy’ and the coop.. uh, coop.. Head Honcho ‘Inserta Namahere’ .
So I decided to take them up on their offer. So I walked down there until I get to a bridge with a Troll standing on the bridge. “Hey, Private Property buddy go back.” I looked at him calmly and simply responded “I know a lot of billy goats that would love to meet you.” I could see some fear in his eyes. He stepped to the side and let me pass. I walked to this school and kicked the door open. The next thing that I remember was waking up about three hours later outside the door.
I got up and knocked. Someone came to the door. I was then brought in and sat down. A guy started to talk to me about how the school was so exclusive then he asked who I was. “I am Horatio T. Marley.” “Ah yes sar The Marley family is of special quality here.” He then stuck me with Inserta Namahere. He put me to the test with a prototype of something called ‘The Machine’. It didn’t look to menacing. More of a joke actually, but nonetheless I still went up against it. I was pretty good I don’t say so myself. Then the insult part came along. Now me being a good sort I saw no reason to insult the other person. But I went along with it any way
I got the hang of it after awhile. He then sent me in the direction of the ‘Sword master’. I walked through the dangers of the forest, which wasn’t very dangerous either because it didn’t have any animals in it or there was a path with signs. So I get there and stand in front of this huge blue house. Then this guy calling himself the greatest swordsman ever comes out and takes his sword out. I quickly whip mine out and clang it against his. He says to me “Only once have I seen a swordsman so unsteady.” He waited and I just ignored the insult. I saw a slight opening in his handle. He repeated, “Only once have I seen a swordsman so unsteady.” I poked my tip into that little hole he had left open and flung his sword out of his hands. I said back to him “Sir I don’t believe in insulting people to break their concentration in a match. That’s how you lost.”
Later I walked out carrying a T-shirt from the dethroned sword master. I walked to the SCUMM Bar but was intercepted by that half- blind guy. “E-e-excuse me sir. A letter for you from Booty Island.” He said I took it from him and said “Thanks” only to realize I was talking to thin air. I read the note to myself.
Dear H.T. Marley,
This is a letter from the council on Booty Island writing to tell you that this morning your father died. Your mother is on a ship to see you and take you to the Governor’s graveyard. This message is also to inform you that if you sign the dotted line on the contract that came with this letter you will then become the governor of the Tri-Island area which will grant you a mansion on any island of your choice and supreme political power over the whole area. We are all anxious for your response.
The Esteemed Council of Governor Marley
I reread the letter over and over again. That one line kept catching my eye “Your father is dead.” Well I walked inside and straight to the Important Pirates. I put the shirt on the table and waited for their reply. “Good job Marley. You only got the thievery thing left—uh what do you seem so dumpy about?” “My father just died,” I said weakly. They kinda looked at each other, You know the way a sick otter looks at a dead fish laying in the water heh heh there’s an interesting picture for ya eh? Well any way the just told me “Well you can skip the thievin thingy. Besides that there aint nothing worth stealin here on Melee.” And ya know what he was right to I’ve been over that island sixty times over and I wouldn’t want to pluck one dang orange from a tree there.
I stole a pen from a local drunk… Well really I just took one out. I mean what would a drunk need a pen for sept to sign his ticket for loitering. Anyway I took out a pen and signed the papers and sent em off. About a week later I got another letter sayin that my mums ship was sunk off the Coast of Jambalaya Island.
If I didn’t know better I’d say that there was some kinda spiritual force working against me here, but that’s just me talking. Well about two months later I had become the official governor. But my mansion was still half built. So I was kind renting out of one of the buildings. Now I realized what I had to do. I had to go out and fulfill my dreams. But I had to start by getting… Married ….