Part: 1: The
Murray was so happy with his arm being re-attached
that he jumped in the air and went BWAHAHAHAHAHA! but, he forgot
he was on the side of a mountain and he started shooting down the
mountain banging his head as he fell. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
he shouted, and eventually he hit into Guybrush. "What's
that white thing coming down the mountain?" asked Guybrush
"Could it be that skull we're lookin' for?" asked
Haggis "Murray?, It's MURRAY! and he's heading right for us!,
RUN!". Murray hit into Guybrush, Guybrush fell over and
knocked Cutthroat Bill down, Cutthroat Bill knocked Edward van
Helgan down, and he hit into Haggis. They all started rolling
down the mountain. Meanwhile, Wally was still up in the mountain.
"Oh look, there's my shoes, and there's another pair of
shoes, and look there's a plank of wood" he said. Wally
looked around him and there was loads of wood, plastic, shoes,
and other stuff. "I know, I'll start a fire" he said.
So Wally gathered it all up into a big pile, 15 foot high, he
also had a box of matches in his pocket. He looked around again
to see if there was any more stuff to burn. "Is that......
could it be......" he said. It was a can of petrol, a full
can. He poured it over the stuff and said "This is gonna be
great!". Then he lit it. It went up in flames and all the
trees caught fire. "Whoops" he said. "The whole
mountain's gonna go up!" with that he decided it was either,
jump, or die, so he jumped down and started rolling down the
mountain. Meanwhile, Guybrush and his crew and Murray were
already down from the mountain. "Look!" said Guybrush
"The whole mountain's gonna go up!" "Wrong, the
whole island's gonna go up" said Cuttroat Bill "We've
got to evacuate the island" said Edward van Helgan "Hmmm
Wally's still up there" said Murray to himself "Quick!
to the ship" said Guybrush. So Guybrush, his crew and Murray
ran to the ship, when they got there it was gone, Stan took it
back because it was only rented for 2 weeks. "WHAT ARE WE
GOING TO DO NOW?!" Shouted Edward van Helgan. "Don't
worry said Guybrush let's just summarise the situation, our ship's
gone, we've no way of getting of the island, Wally's still up in
the mountain" Just as he said that, Wally came rolling down
"Let me say that again, our ship's gone, we've no way of
getting of the island, there's a fire up in the mountain that's
gonna burn the whole island down, and Wally has just rolled down
and knocked me over" "How are we goin' to get off this
island?" asked Haggis "Well, maybe if...... no, maybe.........
no........ I know what if we sneak into a ship when everyone's
leaving." said Guybrush "Great idea, the only problem
is when are they going to leave?" said Edward Van Helgan.
"I don't think they actually know there's a fire on the
island cap'n" said Cuttroat Bill. "Then how are we
going to get off the island?" said Guybrush. "Well cap'n,
we could steal a ship and sail away" said Cuthroat Bill.
While Guybrush and his crew were arguing about how to get off the
island the fire was spreading rapidly and in a few minutes it was
so big the town started to burn down. "Everyone's leaving
the island" said Wally. "Right let's just sneak on to a
ship that's leaving" said Guybrush. The whole crew agreed.
So they ran quickly to the harbour and looked around for a ship.
"What about that one?" said Edward Van Helgan. "Okay
let's go!" said Guybrush. So they all started running
towards the ship. "Hey what about me?" said Murray
"I've got no legs, someone carry me" So Guybrush
carried him into the ship with him. When they where in the ship's
hold they were wondering what ship they were on.
"Where are we?" said Murray "A ship"
said Wally "I know we're on a ship that's obvious, but what
ship?" said Murray."Oooooohhhhh look over there"said
Murray. The whole crew look at where he was pointing (he's got an
arm now remember)."What is it?" Said Guybrush."It's
some sort of white thing" Said Cuttroat Bill."Obviously
it's a white thing, i'm not blind but what sort of white thing?"
Said Guybrush."Is it?......could it be? it's my other arm!"
Said Murray. Haggis went over and picked it up. "It's not
your arm laddie, it's just a bunch of old rags" He said."No,
under them!"Said Murray."Oh, that's also a bunch of old
rags"Said Haggis."Oh crap" Said Murray."Well
I wonder what ship this is anyway" Said Edward Van Helgan."Yeah,
me too" Said Guybrush."Well let's go up on deck and
look around" Said Guybrush."But before that I've got a
question, how did we end up on Grog Island? and why did we go
there in the first place?"Said Haggis. "It's a long
story but, ok a hole was found on the bottom of our ship and we
needed tar to repair it so Wally had some tar but he would only
give us it if we gave him the golden grog mug but he wanted a lot
of money for the map to the golden grog mug so we got Mr.T to
give us some money to buy the map, and we came back here to buy
Wally's map, but the map and the tar isn't important now since
our ship was taken back by Stan" Said Guybrush. "Now I
remember" Said Haggis."So can we see who's ship this is
now?" Said Edward Van Helgan. "Yeah, let's go up on
deck!" Said Murray. "Ok, let's go" Said Guybrush.
So Guybrush and his crew went up on deck, to see what ship they
were on. "Stop, or I'll make ye all walk the plonk and be
eaten by shorks!" Said a pirate who looked like he was the
captain. "Shorks?, Plonk? are you insane?" Said Murray.
"Don't mind him, he's a loonitic, he's always threatening
people, and he's always saying stuff like I'll Koil ya all ya
foils, when what he means to say is I'll Kill ya all ya fools"
Said the first mate. " Is he the captain?" Said
Guybrush."Yep" Said the first mate. "Why don't you
have someone else as your captain, since he's an absolute crazy
man?" Said Murray. "This is an incredibly long story so
anyone who needs to go to the toilet go now because I'm not
letting you go in the middle of my story, well, it all started on
Dagger Island, it's called that because the discoverer of the
island liked daggers and he called the island Dagger island, he
also liked killing people with daggers but let's get back to why
Joe's our captain" Said the first mate. "Joe?"
Said Cutthroat Bill. The first mate started his story again
"That's the captain's name, but let's get back to the story,
we were in a storm and I was the captain, the storm nearly
capesized the ship, I though we were all going to die, but I didn't
let the rest of the crew know that, then I saw Dagger Island, I
quickly turned the ship into the island because we were going to
die unless I crashed the ship into the island, so I crashed the
ship into the island and we got off the ship and onto the island,
I went around to the starboard side and there was no damage at
all and I said "I thought it would be much worse than that"
then I looked at the port side, or at least where it was, if you
know what I mean, the whole side was torn out, so we went into
the biggest town on the island, Sword Town, it's a big Island you
know and all the towns are named after things that can stab
people, so we found a guy who would repair our ship for 2000
pieces o' eight, so while he was out repairing our ship we had
some grog at the tavern, which is called the Bloody Tavern I
think it's owned by the same people as the Bloody lip, while we
where there, Joe came up to us and said he knows the way to the
greatest treasure ever!" said Phil"Big Whoop!"
Said Guybrush interrupting Phil "No, even bigger, the
treasure of Biggest Whoop" Said the first mate "I never
heard of that" Said Guybrush "Then you probably don't
know about Bigger Whoop either" Said the first mate "Nope"
Said Guybrush "Well Big Whoop is a big load of treasure,
Bigger Whoop is bigger, but Biggest Whoop is the biggest treasure
ever!, and Big Whoop and Bigger Whoop are big piles and piles of
treasure, but Biggest Whoop is just one big............ erm,
something, we're not sure if it's a diamond or something like a
magical ball or something but it's valuable and big, back to my
story and no more interruptions, but Joe would only tell us the
way to it if we made him the captain, so now he's the captain and
we're going to an island called Ghost Island, it's called that
because the ghost of the guy who found Dagger Island is said to
haunt the island and kill anyone who comes to the island with
daggers, or so that loonitic Joe says" Said the first mate.
"What's your name anyway?" Said Cuttroat Bill "I'm
not going to tell you my real name because you are all going to
laugh so just call me...... let me think......hmmmm what's a good
name...... I know Ricardo...no.......ok here's my real name, try
not to laugh, Phil Tea" Said the first mate "What's so
funny about that?" Said Guybrush and his crew "Do you
not get it? Phil tea, you know Phil tea it's like the word F-I-L-T-H-Y
Filthy"Said Phil "I get it now"Said Guybrush and
they all started laughing uncontrollably. "There's rocks
ahead" Said a voice from somewhere in the ship. "I'll
drive" Said Phil "Who's that?" Said Murray "That's
the lookout, his name's Herman Toothrot" Said Phil "Herman
Toothrot, that's even funnier than Phil Tea" Said Murray,
then he started laughing but everyone was just looking at him
because, well it wasn't really that funny. "Herman Toothrot?"
Said Guybrush "How did he get here?" "You know
Herman?" Said Phil "Yup, I met him on Monkey Island,
then I saw him again when I was on Dinky Island" Said
Guybrush "There was something I was going to tell everyone,
but I think i've forgotten it, let me think............... oh
yeah that's it, this guy on Dagger Island said he found some
bones it was nearly a complete skeleton, apart from the skull,
one arm and the collar bone, but you probably don't really care,
I just thought i'd tell you" Said Phil "I care, I care
a lot, how far is Dagger Island?" Said Murray "About
200 Miles away, but we won't be stopping there on our way to
Ghost Island, or at least we don't plan to" Said Phil "Do
you think we could get the rest of my bones sometime, preferably
sometime soon" Said Murray "Maybe sometime, after all
this novel is called Murray's search for his body" Said
Haggis "Novel?" Everyone asked "I don't know why I
said that" Said Haggis "Wasn't there rocks ahead?"
Said Edward Van Helgan "Oh yeah, I was supposed to drive, I
wonder who's driving now" Said Phil "Joe's taken the
wheel off me again!" Shouted Herman Toothrot "Oh no not
again!" Said Phil "What's so bad about Joe taking the
wheel?" Said Murray "The last time Joe drove this ship
we tried to take it off him and he went crazy and he ended up
crashing into an island and we were stuck there for 3 months"
Said Phil "That can't be good" Said Edward Van Helgan
"I'll try to get the wheel off him Herman, you just watch
and when I say so get the net and put it over him and take him
away until he calms down" Said Phil. When Phil tried to get
the wheel off Joe, he went crazy and started turning the wheel
everywhere, but Joe gave it to him eventually, but it was time
for everyone to go asleep then, so everyone went to sleep, but in
the middle of the night there was a noise. " Hhhmmmm what's
that noise" Said Phil. So Phil went up on the deck to see
what it was, it was Joe, he had got up in the middle of the night
and taken the wheel, and somehow the ship was near Dagger Island
already, Phil tried to take the wheel off Joe and Joe went crazy
again and steered towards Dagger Island. "You're going to
crash the ship you fool!" Said Phil "No i'm not, I'm
going to steer into that holiday resort" Said Joe. Phil
couldn't take the wheel off Joe in time and the ship crashed into
Dagger Island and it smashed up like a snowball hitting against a
wall, Joe and Phil were knocked unconscious. When everyone woke
up they were on a beach. "Where are we and what happened?"
Said Guybrush "It appears that a monster smashed our ship in
the middle of the night and we all washed up on this island"
said Herman Toothrot "Yes, sure that's what happened now I'll
call the men in white coats and they'll be happy to take you away
to the nut hou
.. I mean happy house yes that'll do
not the nut house, the happy house he he he he " said Phil
"What happened was, that nut house escapee Joe took control
of the ship and crashed the ship into Dagger Island" said
Phil "You never said that Joe was a nut house escapee!"
Said Cutthroat Bill "You never told us what the name of the
ship was either" Said Wally "Really? I thought I did,
but anyway it was The Pacific Sunset" said Phil "Well
how are we going to get to Ghost Island now? and I've kind of got
another question, can we please get my bones from that guy now?"said
Murray "Well we might aswell look for that guy now since our
ship is completely smashed up and we've got nothing else to do
and you never know we might even get a new ship while we're
looking" Said Phil. So they all went to look for the guy who
had the bones, but Herman Toothrot, Joe and the rest of The
Pacific Sunset's crew stayed behind. "Wait a minute, why are
we looking for my bones if Phil didn't even tell us where the guy
was" said Murray "Oh yeah, I knew I forgot to tell you
all something, he was in the Bloody Tavern beside Joe" said
Phil "Well let's go to the Bloody Tavern, where is it?"
said Edward van Helgan "Luckily Sword Town is just about 20
minutes away, then once we get into Sword Town it should only
take about 1 minute to get to the Bloody Tavern" Said Phil.
So Guybrush and everyone else went to Sword Town, when they got
there it was almost completely deserted except for 2 people on
the road and about 10 people looking at them. "What's going
on here?, how come there's hardly anyone outside?" said
Wally "There's goin' to be a swordfight, those 2 guys on the
road should be drawing their sword's now any minute" said an
old guy who was looking at them "Who are you?" said
Wally "The name's John Hussfutianiantrenorrean, yes that'll
do" said the old guy " Really?!" said Wally "No
not really, my real name is George Sword, well not exactly, my
real name is George Tweekingsonpoliatannyortilorphius but since
my name is George Tweekingsonpoliatannyortilorphius and well that's
not the shortest of names my friends just call me George Sword,
why? because I love Sword fights" said the old guy " Wh
said Wally but he could only start what he was going to say
before the Sword fight began, they started fighting and in only a
minute one of the guys who were fighting knocked the sword out of
the other guy's hand, but the guy who had his sword knocked out
of his hand cleverly distracted the other guy by saying "hey
look it's a comet" and he quickly picked up his sword, they
fought for half an hour until one of the guys was knocked over
and surrendered. "Why were they fighting?" said
Guybrush " I dunno" said George "We're looking for
a guy who found some bones, nearly a complete skeleton, you
wouldn't know where he is would you?" said Murray "I'm
him" said George "They're my bones give them back or be
destroyed BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" said Murray "No, but you
can have them for just 50 pieces O' eight" said George
"50 pieces O' eight! I don't have any money, erm.. Phil,
will you please buy my bones?" said Murray "Ok Murray"
said Phil and he bought Murray's bones "But there's one more
thing I've got to tell you, I sold both of the legs to a pirate
who while remain nameless who said he was going to Ghost Island"
said George as he went into the Bloody Tavern. "Well nothing
left to do now but go back to the ship" said Haggis "Yipee!"
shouted Murray "Why are you going yipee, you don't have your
legs back?" said Edward van Helgan "Because I've got my
bones now, well except for my legs, but we're going to Ghost
Island anyway so soon I'm going to have my bones back!" said
Murray and they all went back to the ship. When they got there
all of the crew were gathering together anything that survived
the crash. "All of the crew of the Pacific Sunset including
me have decided to stay here on Dagger Island, because we just
think it's too dangerous being a pirate, we're all going to
follow our dream of being cannon salesman, and Joe doesn't want
to be a captain anymore, he says it's not much fun being a
captain if your not even allowed to steer your own ship, and Joe
made a map to Ghost Island so all of you can find Biggest Whoop
some day" said Herman Toothrot "Really? You're all
staying here? I'm gonna miss all of you" said Phil "Guybrush,
there's something we've been meaning to tell you for a while,
since we're talking about people staying here, we want to go back
to being barbers, so we're going to be staying here on Dagger
Island" said Haggis "Who is?" said Guybrush "Me,
Edward van Helgan, Cutthroat Bill and Wally's becoming a barber
too, so we'll finally have a barber shop quartet and not just 3
of us calling ourselves a quartet" said Haggis "So that
means it's just Me, Phil and Murray from now on, well, bye Wally,
Edward, Haggis and bye Cutthroat Bill" said Guybrush. So
then they all said goodbye and Guybrush, Murray and Phil went off
to look for a ship.
Getting a ship
"Well, where are we going to get a ship now?"
said Murray "Maybe we could go to the Bloody Tavern, and ask
someone if there's a ship salesman nearby, or we could at least
get a grog there" said Guybrush "Yeah let's go to the
Bloody Tavern, I haven't had a grog in about 4 months, let's go!"
said Phil "Where is the Bloody Tavern again?" said
Guybrush "It's about 5 minutes away even if we walk slow, it's
just around that corner, and then we just keep on walking until
we see it" said Phil "5 minutes, aawww I don't want to
wait that long I can't keep carrying Murray around everywhere, my
legs hurt and my arms hurt, will you hold Murray?" said
Guybrush "Ok but only until we get to the Bloody Tavern"
said Phil, and Guybrush gave Phil Murray. "AAAAAAHHHHHH!,
OUCH!" said Murray, Guybrush dropped Murray while he was
giving him to Phil. "Whoops, sorry Murray" said
Guybrush "I have a feeling you were being sarcastic when you
said sorry there , I'm on to you!, I know your plan, you want to
kill me don't you, well it won't work, I'm a demonic skull, I'm
already dead, but technically now I'm not just a demonic skull,
since I've got arms, a rib cage, and more bones too, so in theory
I'm actually a
.. " said Murray, and he kept on talking
a load of rubbish, and using big words like: theoretically and
technically. "I think Murray's gone crazy" said
Guybrush to Phil, while Murray was still talking a load of
rubbish. When they finally made it to the Bloody Tavern, Murray
was still talking. "Murray must hold the world record for
the longest time talking a load of big words" said Phil
"Yeah, let's call up the Guinness book of records people and
tell them about Murray's great achievement in the field of
talking lots" said Guybrush. So then they went into the
Bloody Tavern and sat down beside the counter and started talking
to the barman. "Is there anywhere that you know of, that we
can get a ship from?" said Phil "Yup Ricardio Délmontió,
sells new and used ships" said the barman "Where is
Ricardio Délmontió?" said Guybrush "I'll only tell
you if you buy a grog" said the barman "Ok, how much is
it?" said Guybrush "3 pieces O' eight" said the
barman "Here, take it" said Guybrush "Ricardio Délmontió
is sitting over there, towards the back of the tavern" said
the barman. So then they went to the back of the bar to meet
Ricardio Délmontió, when they got there, he was playing poker.
"Well, well what have we here?" said Ricardio "I'm
Phil and this is Murray and Guybrush" said Phil "That
was a rhetorical question, by the way" said Ricardio "Oh,
well anyway, we want a ship, and the barman tells us that you
sell ships" said Phil "I do, what kind of ship do you
want?, I've got big used ships, big new ships, small used ships
and small new ships" said Ricardio "How much would your
cheapest, big new ship be?" said Phil "That all depends,
how much you got?" said Ricardio "I've got 100 pieces O'
eight and a toy soldier and some chewing gum" said Guybrush
"I've got nothing, well except for a half eaten piece of pie"
said Murray "I've got 50000 pieces O' eight that I got from
robbing other pirates" said Phil "So that's 500100
pieces O' eight then, come outside with me" said Ricardio.
So then Guybrush, Murray and Phil, followed Ricardio Délmontió
for about an hour
.. until finally
they got to Ricardio's secret ship place. "Welcome to
Ricardio's ship extravaganza, I know the name's kinda crappy but
I just couldn't think of any other name" said Ricardio
"Follow me" he added "Awwww we better not be
following you for as long as we were before" said Guybrush.
So they followed Ricardio to a ship. "This one's called the
Caribbean Tide, it's a new ship which you can have for 500 pieces
O' eight, but there's also some extras that you might want to
consider: 6 cannons on each side are 10000, 5 years guarantee is
6000 and titanium hull armour is 10000 and finally internet
access is 200" said Ricardio "Internet? You can get the
internet now? I thought it hadn't been invented yet" said
Murray "Well it has been invented, so do you want to buy
this fine ship?" said Ricardio "Yeah ok, but why is it
only 500 pieces O' eight?" said Guybrush "Well, they
say it's haunted, but I haven't found any ghosts on it yet, and
what extras do you want, if you want any?" said Ricardio
"We'll take all the extras, and I better pay for it Guybrush
since you've only got 100 pieces O' eight " said Phil "So
your grand total comes to 26700 pieces O' eight" said
Ricardio "Here's the money" said Phil as he gave
Ricardio the money. Then Guybrush, Murray, and Phil got on board
their new ship, and got ready to set sail for Ghost Island.
"Bye Ricardio, thanks for selling us the new ship at such a
low price even if they do say it's haunted" said Phil "Yeah,
thanks Ricardio" said Murray and Guybrush "Bye Murray,
Guybrush and Phil, I hope you find Biggest Whoop some day"
said Ricardio. Then Guybrush, Murray and Phil set sail for Ghost
Part 4: The
"Give me that map Joe gave you Guybrush"
said Phil "Here you go" said Guybrush as he gave him
the map "Let's see, here's Dagger Island, and here's Ghost
Island, and we're at Dagger Island, so that means, we're about
200 miles away" said Phil as he pointed at the map "How
long do you think it should take us to get to Ghost Island?"
said Guybrush "Well, I don't know" said Phil "Hey
what's that?" said Murray "It looks like another ship"
said Guybrush "Do you think they're pirates who are chasing
us to steal everything we've got and enslave us and bring us to a
planet called Piratron in order to build a ray gun to destroy the
Earth?!" said Murray "I think so, well all except for
the bit about enslaving us and bringing us to a planet called
Piraton to build a ray gun" said Phil. Then the other ship
started going faster and faster chased Guybrush, Murray and Phil
for at least an hour until they were side by side. "We'll
make you a deal, stop and let us board yer ship, or we'll open
fire!" said a voice from the other ship "Oh no, they're
going to take us to Piratron to enslave us!" said Murray
"Didn't you just make that up?" said Guybrush "Oh
yeah, I did just make that up, phew, I thought we were goners"
said Murray. "I'll give ye 'til the count of 20 to stop,
then we open fire, and just so you know we're serious, you now
have only 'til the count of ten" said the same voice from
the other ship. "Wait a minute they only have 4 cannons on
that other ship, and besides we have titanium hull armour, they
can't hurt us" said Phil "Ok we're opening fire,
prepare to die!" said the voice from the other ship. So the
other ship opened fire and was firing at Phil's ship for well
over an hour until the other ship ran out of cannon balls. "BWAHAHAHAHA!
You cannot defeat us and our demonic ghost ship BWAHAHAHAHA! Well,
actually it's not a ghost ship, it's just a ship" said
Murray to the other ship "Now we'll make YOU a deal, you
give us all your treasure and valuables or WE'LL open fire, but
first what is your name?" said Phil "My name is Kygrush Meepwood, now just board our ship please, he he he" said the
voice "Kygrush Meepwood? That sounds like my name, Guybrush
Threepwood" said Guybrush. You might be wondering why
Kygrush Meepwood wants Phil, Guybrush and Murray to board their
ship, well this is why: Phil's ship had titanium hull armour, and
there's no way Kygrush Meepwood could win at a ship battle, but
if Guybrush, Phil and Murray came onto Kygrush's ship, his crew
could easily win at a sword fight, take Guybrush, Phil and Murray
prisoner and steal all their money, so that's why Kygrush wants
them to come onto his ship, but now back to the story. "Do
you think we're fools? If we go onto your ship you'll just take
us hostage and take us to Piratron!" said Murray "Are
you insane Murray? The reason why he wants us to go on to his
ship, is because he wants to take us hostage, steal our ship, and
turn it into a ghost ship, so that they can rule the seas with it!"
said Guybrush "AM I THE ONLY SANE PERSON HERE?!!!!!!!!!! The
reason why he wants us to go on to his ship is because if we go
on to his ship he'll take us hostage, probably tie us up, and
then while we're still tied up, he'll go onto our ship with his
crew and take all our treasure!" said Phil. "Does
anyone have any idea of how we're going to get his treasure?"
said Guybrush. And Guybrush and Phil and Murray started talking
and arguing about how they were going to get Kygrush's treasure,
but while they were arguing, Kygrush realised that they had found
out about his plan to get Guybrush, Phil and Murray's treasure
and money, so whilst they were still arguing, Kygrush and his
crew decided to sneak away from Phil's ship and get as far away
as possible from them. "I know what if we do this: we get
one of his crew members to come over to our ship and give us
their treasure!, no that won't work, he might have a gun"
said Murray "I know we can get two of his crew members on
our ship, one of them will load their treasure onto our ship and
one of them will be held hostage by us, until all the treasure is
loaded onto our ship!" said Phil "That's a great idea!,
only one problem" said Guybrush "What's that?, it sound
good to me" said Murray "Their ship is gone, they must
have left while we were arguing" said Guybrush "No it's
not, it's right there, no wait a minute it's over there, no it's
not, your right, they're gone!" said Phil "Well we
better get back to going to Ghost Island, finding Biggest Whoop,
and finding my legs" said Murray. "Yeah we better get
going to Ghost Island fast or we'll never get to Ghost Island"
said Phil "For some reason I think this is going to take
ages for us to get to Ghost Island" said Guybrush "Me
too, by the way we did remember to buy food and supplies and
stuff like that for our journey to Ghost Island didn't we?"
said Phil "I didn't buy anything, I thought Murray did"
said Guybrush "Me? You thought I could buy food and supplies
for a big voyage to an island, keeping in mind that I've got no
legs?, I wish I could, but sadly I've got no legs" said
Murray "Oh yeah, I never really remembered you have no legs"
said Guybrush "Then we've got to get some supplies, there's
only one Island we'll be passing by on our way to Ghost Island,
and we should be able to see the Island coming into view in about
5 hours" said Phil "What's it called?" said
Guybrush "It's called Broken Bottle Island, it was
discovered by the same person who discovered Dagger Island, I
think Broken Bottle Island's a stupid name but I suppose the
discoverer did like knives and other stabbing objects, but I
still think it's a stupid name, also the town we're going to be
getting our supplies from is called nwot ekipS" said Phil
"nwot ekipS? That doesn't make sense, nwot isn't a word and
ekipS isn't either" said Guybrush "Wait a minute, oh
sorry the map was upside down, it's called Spike Town" said
Phil "I'm bored, what am going to do for 5 hours?" said
Guybrush "Well it just so happens that when we were about to
leave Dagger Island, Ricardio Délmontió asked me did I want a
telly on board for 150 Pieces O' eight, but I said no, but then
he said he'd give it to me for 100 pieces O' eight, so then I got
it" said Phil "A telly! Cool, where is it?" said
Murray "It's in the cargo hold" said Phil "Let's
go!" said Guybrush "There's only one problem" said
Phil "What's that?" said Guybrush "There's no
electricity" said Phil "NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Murray and Guybrush shouted. "But there is one way for the
telly to work" said Phil "How?! You've got to tell me!"
said Murray "There's an exercise bike hooked up to it, if
one of you goes on the exercise bike, it'll make electricity
because of a little thing Ricardio put on it, but that means that
both of you can't watch the telly at the same time" said
Phil "Ok Murray, you cycle on the bike for an hour then I'll
cycle for an hour, Murray" said Guybrush "Ok Guybrush I'll
just cycle for an hour even though I DON'T HAVE ANY LEGS!"
said Murray "Oh yeah, but we'll think of something"
said Guybrush, then Guybrush and Murray went down to the hold to
watch telly. So after that nothing really happened for a while
Until, they got to Ghost Island. "Hey Guybrush, Murray, I
see something ahead of us" said Phil. So Guybrush and Murray
ran up on deck, as quickly as they could to see what was going on.
"What's going on, this better be good, I was watching
something good on the telly" said Murray "Look I think
it's Ghost Island!" said Phil "What's that around the
island?" said Guybrush "I think it's a load of mist"
said Phil "Or maybe, it's evil ghosts that are protecting
the island and Biggest Whoop" said Murray. "Well let's
get closer to the island so that we can see it better, you two
can just get back to watching telly" said Phil "Is it
just me or were we supposed to get supplies on Broken Bottle
Island?" said Guybrush "Oh yeah, I forgot about that,
but it turns out I just forgot that I already had supplies before
we even left Dagger Island" said Phil. So then Guybrush and
Murray got back to watching telly, while Phil was getting the
ship nearer to Ghost Island.
"Guybrush, Murray we're here!"
said Phil "Where?" said Murray "Ghost Island"
said Phil. Guybrush and Murray ran up to the deck. "Are we
through the mist yet?" said Guybrush "Do you think we
could actually see the Island if there was still mist?" said
Phil "No" said Guybrush "Then we're obviously
through the mist then aren't we?" said Phil. "Let's go
onto the Island" said Murray "Ok let's go!" said
Phil. Then they all came on to the Island. "Well where are
we supposed to look for the treasure?" said Guybrush "Let's
see, it says where on this map, ok we're on the east side of the
island so it's says there should be an X nearby, so let's start
looking" said Phil. "I found it" said Murray
"Wait a minute I found another one" said Guybrush
"It says here that to find the right X we've got to solve
this puzzle that's written on the map: There should be a number
beside the 2 Xs and it's a Roman numeral, the right one is the
one which is 9 in roman numerals" said Phil "I found
the numbers" said Murray "Good, now tell me the numbers"
said Phil "One is VIII and the other is X" said Murray
"Are you sure that you don't mean IX instead of X?"
said Phil "No, it's definitely X and not IX, so which one is
9?" said Murray "VIII is 8 and X is 10" said Phil
"How can that be?" said Guybrush. "If we pick the
wrong one it says on the map that the hole caves in and we fall
in and onto spikes" said Phil. So they started to try and
figure out the puzzle, they were thinking for well over an hour
when finally Guybrush had an idea. "I know, since VIII is 8
and X is 10, maybe that means that the treasure is in between the
two Xs" said Guybrush "Yeah that must be it" said
Murray "Treasure? Oh yeah I didn't mention that under the X
isn't the treasure, under the X lies the instructions to find the
treasure" said Phil "So if we dig here we'll hopefully
find the directions to Biggest Whoop?" said Guybrush "Yup
hopefully" said Phil. So they started digging and digging
and finally they found something. "I think I found something"
said Guybrush "Is it the directions?" said Murray
"It's a chest" said Guybrush "Then open it"
said Phil. And Guybrush opened it. "It's the directions, Woohoo!" said Phil "We can find Biggest Whoop!"
said Guybrush "Woohoo!" said Murray. "I don't want
to spoil the moment, but I think I've got something Important to
say" said Guybrush "What?" said Phil and Murray
together "Isn't that Lechuck's ghost ship coming toward us?"
said Guybrush "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! It's Lechuck!"
said Phil "You sound like you've had your share of bad times
with Lechuck" said Guybrush "I sure have, he was the
pirate I sold Murray's legs to when I was on that Island and I'd
rather not discuss what happened" said Phil. "Maybe
that means I can get my legs back" said Murray "But why
did Lechuck want my legs?" Murray added. "He didn't say"
said Phil. "Look they're coming onto the island and they're
running towards us" said Guybrush. Guybrush, Murray and Phil
tried to run from Lechuck's skeletal pirates, but in the end
Guybrush, Murray and Phil were captured, knocked out and put in
prison on Lechuck's ghost ship. "Where are we?" said
Phil after regaining consciousness "I think we're in some
place where Lechuck keeps his prisoners" said Murray "It's
a lot better here in Lechuck's prison type thing where he keeps
his prisoners than when I was captured, me and Wally were hanging
over an acid pit that was lowering gradually, but that wasn't on
a ghost ship, so maybe things are just better here" said
Guybrush "How can we escape?" said Phil "Hhhhmmmm
Let me think, there's no doors or windows here, except the door
over there that's guarded by skeletal pirates" said Guybrush.
Then they all began to think of how they could get out of the
.. and then they thought some more
.. until, about 2 days later Guybrush
had an idea. "I know, what if Murray, since he's a skeleton
pirate, or well, used to be, maybe he could talk to the guard or
something" said Guybrush "Yeah that's a great idea!"
said Phil "Then when the guard's distracted we can hit him
on the back of the head with a lead pipe, knocking him
unconscious and run" said Guybrush "I don't want to
talk to him, I probably don't even know him anyway, and besides
we don't have a lead pipe" said Murray. "Well, then
look at him, and see if you recognise him" said Phil "No,
I'm scared of him" said Murray "Remember when we met
George Sword ? Tell me who bought your bones from him" said
Phil "You did" said Murray "Then go talk to that
guard and then we'll call it even" said Phil "Ok, but
what will I say?" said Murray "Just ask him something
like, how did you become a skeleton pirate? Or something like
that" said Guybrush. Then Murray went up to the guard and
started talking to him. "Hi Mr. Guard person, I was
wondering how did you become a skeleton pirate?" said Murray
to the guard "Well it's quite an interesting story actually
Said the guard as he began to tell Murray his story, but before
he could say any more he was hit on the back of the head, by
Guybrush and Phil. "Let's run!!!!!" said Guybrush
"I can't I've got no legs! Someone carry me!" said
Murray. So Guybrush carried him, and they all ran up to where
Lechuck was, hitting guards along the way, and then stealing
their swords, until, they were at the door to Lechuck's cabin.
"Let's break the door down!" said Guybrush. And they
broke the door down and entered Lechuck's cabin. "GIMME MY
LEGS BACK!" said Murray. "Huh? Who are you? , and who
are those people with you? Wait a minute, THREEPWOOD!" said Lechuck. "Yes Lechuck it's me, I fought off all of your
minions by myself and now I have come for you!" said
Guybrush "You did not! We fought them off too you know, so
stop pretending to be a hero!" said Murray and Phil together.
"Anyway, give Murray back his arms, so we can leave, or
alternatively you can die!" said Guybrush. "This bird's
gonna fly!" said Lechuck as he jumped out a window and swam
away. "Ok I didn't expect that to happen, and it's so unlike
Lechuck too" said Guybrush "Who cares? Let's just go"
said Phil. Then they ran from the ship and pushed it a bit from
the shore so it would drift away, and it did. "Now let's
find Biggest Whoop, so where do we start looking?" said
Guybrush "Let's see, it says on the map that you keep going
up the mountain, until you see a cave, then it says that deep
within the cave is Biggest Whoop" said Phil "What
mountain?" said Guybrush "The one over there, but there
is one more thing I've got to tell you" said Phil "What?"
said Murray "The ghost of the guy who found Dagger Island
supposedly guards the treasure and kills people who try to take
it, and he kills them with pointy and sharp things" said
Phil. "You told us that before, Phil" said Guybrush
"Yeah, there's no such thing as ghosts" said Murray
"But there's such things as skeletal pirates isn't there?"
said Phil. "Yeah I suppose there could be such things as
ghosts" said Murray "So anyway let's go!" said
Phil "You forgot to carry me!" said Murray "But we
got your legs" said Guybrush "You didn't actually put
them on yet" said Murray "Oh yeah, well anyway I better
attach them" said Phil, then he attached Murray's legs.
screamed Murray. "Now I am invincible!" said Murray.
Then they all ran up the mountain until they came to the cave.
"This must be it, let's get Biggest Whoop!" said Phil
"It's pretty dark inside isn't it?" said Guybrush
"Yes, and your point is?" said Phil "Hhhhmmm I dunno, we won't be able to see!" said Guybrush "Well I'll
go back to the ship and get a lantern, you two don't move"
said Phil. Then he ran back to the ship to get the lantern.
"Maybe we could just take a peek inside" said Guybrush
"Yeah it couldn't hurt just to take a little peek, we'll
just stay in for a few seconds " said Murray. And then they
were just starting to go into the cave when Phil came back.
"Hey I told you not to move" said Phil "We weren't
going into the cave, yeah we were just er
doing that thing,
what were we doing again Murray?" said Guybrush "We
were just looking for something Guybrush dropped, yes that'll do"
said Murray "Anyway let's just go into the cave" said
They started to enter the cave and they went pretty
far into the cave until
shouted Guybrush, Murray and Phil, the floor had caved in, and
they fell and hit the floor below. "Ouch, that hurt"
said Guybrush "Where are we?" said Murray "It says
something about this on the map, I think Biggest Whoop is that
way" said Phil pointing to a wall. "That's a wall, how
could Biggest Whoop be that way" said Guybrush "Maybe
there's a secret switch or something" said Murray "Maybe
there is a secret switch, you probably have to push in a certain
brick or something" said Phil "Maybe let's see"
said Guybrush as leaned against the wall. "AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
What's happening!?!?!?!?!" said Guybrush as the wall turned
around along with Guybrush so that he was behind the wall. "Guybrush
can you hear me?" said Phil "Yeah" said Guybrush
"We're coming in after you" said Murray. Then they both
leaned against the wall and the same thing happened, they went
behind the wall. "Look, there's some writing on the wall"
said Guybrush "It says: Beware all those who read this!
Biggest Whoop is just down the hallway, but the Ghost of Yarging
"The Dagger" Mcfargington (the guy who discovered
Dagger Island) guards Biggest Whoop, you have been warned!"
said Phil "Maybe the ghost of the guy who found Dagger
Island does actually guard Biggest Whoop" said Guybrush
"Yeah, but I wonder if it's true that he throws sharp and
pointy stabbing objects at people" said Murray "Well,
we'll see once we get to Biggest Whoop" said Phil. So
Guybrush, Phil and Murray started going down the hallway to
Biggest Whoop, but when they got to Biggest Whoop, they had a big
surprise coming. "We're almost at Biggest Whoop now, just a
little further" said Phil. "Ok we're here, now"
said Phil. They were in a small square room, with a little pillar
in the centre, and there was a box on top of the pillar. "Look
at the box over there on the pillar" said Murray "That
must be Biggest Whoop, I always thought it might be a bit bigger
but, it's size doesn't matter" said Phil "Let's take it"
said Guybrush. "I DON'T THINK YOUR GOING TO BE TAKING THAT!"
said a voice "Who's there?" said Guybrush "It's me
Yarging "The Dagger" Mcfargington or at least I'm the
ghost of Yarging "The Dagger" Mcfargington" said
the voice "AAAAAHHHHHH! The stories were true!" said
Phil "Yes there were true! And now I'm going to throw
Said the voice "Pointy things at us!" said Guybrush
interrupting "No, I'm not going to throw pointy things at
you, I'm going to throw my voice at you" said the voice
"Your voice?" said Murray "Yeah I'm going to do
some ventriloquism" said the voice. "That's not right,
it says on the map that the ghost of Yarging "The Dagger"
Mcfargington was supposed to throw sharp and pointy things at
anyone who wanted to take Biggest Whoop" said Phil "That's
because I'm not the ghost of Yarging "The Dagger"
Mcfargington" said the voice. "Then who are you, where
are you?" said Phil "I'm not the ghost because I'm
LECHUCK!" said the voice as he came into Guybrush, Murray
and Phil's view. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's Lechuck!" said Guybrush "But how did you come back
to Ghost Island, if we set your ship adrift?" said Murray
"Well wouldn't you like to know, it's a long story but I'll
tell you, we were drifting for a long time until
Lechuck until he was interrupted by Guybrush. "But you
jumped out of the window and said this bird's gonna fly, so how
were you on the ship?" said Guybrush "Well, when I saw
that the ship was adrift I decided to swim back to the ship, then
said Lechuck as he told his story, and neither Guybrush, Murray
or Phil were even listening, then when Lechuck had his back
turned, Guybrush spotted an opened door with a ramp leading down
on to the beach. "That seems a little too convenient, to be
true, but hey I might aswell use it to my advantage" said
Guybrush to himself, right before pushing Lechuck down the ramp
and onto the beach. "Bye Lechuck" said Guybrush as he
locked the door. "Ok now, let's get Biggest Whoop and get
outta here" said Guybrush. "I THINK NOT!" said the
real ghost Yarging "The Dagger" Mcfargington as he
walked in to the room through a narrow hallway, then when he had
just about entered the room, Guybrush hit him on the back of the
head. "GET BIGGEST WHOOP AND RUN!!!!!" said Guybrush.
Then they started running out of the room until they got to the
place where the floor caved in. "How do we get up there?"
said Phil "I'm coming to get you!" said the ghost, then
he started throwing knives at Guybrush "DIE! Especially you,
that one who hit me on the back of the head" said the ghost
and he started throwing knives at Guybrush, but Guybrush dodged
them every time, and eventually the knives made a kind of ladder
on the wall. "Hey look, we can climb up on the knives"
said Phil "Go Guybrush! Climb up on the knives!" said
Phil "I'm trying to dodge the knives" said Guybrush.
"Hey look at that thing on the wall!" said Murray to
the ghost, while pointing to the wall. "What? Where? I can't
see anything" said the ghost "GO! GUYBRUSH!" said
Phil. Then Guybrush climbed up the knives, followed by Murray and
then Phil. "What? I still can't see anything" the ghost
was still saying as he was looking at the wall. So then Guybrush,
Murray and Phil ran out of the cave and down the mountain to the
beach. "WOOHOO! We've got Biggest Whoop" said Guybrush
"Let's open it!" said Murray "Not until we're on
the ship" said Phil as they walked up to the ship and got on
board. "Now can we open the box?" said Guybrush. "Yeah
ok , let's open it!" said Phil. So Phil slowly opened the
box and discovered what was inside. "It's a big whoopee
cushion!" said Phil "The box says Biggest Whoop"
said Murray "Wait a minute there's some dust on it"
said Guybrush as he blew the box "It says Biggest Whoopee
Cushion" said Phil as he took the whoopee cushion out of the
box. "Wait a minute there's something else in the box"
said Murray "It's some kind of glass ball" said
Guybrush "This must really be Biggest Whoop" said Phil.
"There's a piece of paper in here too" said Murray.
"Yeah, it says: Instructions for Biggest Whoop, look into
crystal ball and say the time when you want something predicted
and then state the place which you want to see the future and
look into ball, well it sounds simple to me" said Guybrush ."Give
me it for a second, let me see, 20 seconds, on this ship"
said Phil and it showed him what happened, and Phil started
laughing to himself, and counting to 20 in his mind. Then 20
seconds later Guybrush fell overboard. "AAAAHHHH!" said
Guybrush as he fell into the sea and Phil started laughing.
"You knew this was happening, why didn't you tell me!?"
said Guybrush as he climbed back aboard with the help of a ladder
Murray passed down to him. "I didn't tell you because, erm
you shouldn't try to change the future, yes that'll do" said
Phil. "We've finally found Biggest Whoop, anyway what do you
think we should use this ball for?" said Phil "Predicting
stuff like fires and then making sure they don't start, that sort
of thing" said Guybrush "Yeah, probably" said Phil
"I want to rule the world now because I've got my new body,
but first I've got to make a plan for world domination" said
Murray. "Yes stopping fires, that'll do, if only they knew
that they could make money from this thing by betting on horse
races, I'm gonna be rich" said Guybrush to himself, while
smiling. "The fools, neither Murray nor Guybrush have even
realised the possibilities of making money from this, by betting"
said Phil to himself, while smiling also "I'm gonna be rich
from this ball, the fools haven't even realised we could predict
horse races with this thing" said Murray to himself. And
they all were smiling, each thinking that they were the only one
who realised the money you could make from the ball. "You
know what I've always wondered?" said Guybrush "What?"
said Murray and Phil "If a tree falls in the forest and
nobody's around to hear it, what colour is it?, or at least I
think that's what Herman Toothrot said and I've been wondering
ever since" said Guybrush.