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Monkey Island 5 - Operation Guybrush.
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Chapter 2: Things are hotting up.

"Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" Guybrush's petrified screams at the mere thought of so much porcelain, an inhumane quantity that he personally considers the worst possible form of torture in existence echo throughout the Caribbean. As he does so, a pirate on a neighbouring boat, having just suffered the humiliation of losing an insult sword-fighting match very badly, and as a result, having no treasure in his hold shakes his head sympathetically.
"Poor guy." the fellow murmurs."Shut yer hole!" hisses Largo venomously in response to Guybrush's desperate screams, drawing his sword and pointing it menacingly at Guybrush from behind. He feels the very tip of the blade press slightly in a notch in his lower back, the blade's position resting, but ready to strike if necessary. When on the Sea Cucumber, Guybrush just lost control of his emotions completely, although he also felt a little emboldened and cocky, perhaps feeling in comparative safety because Elaine was close by, but now, he realises that his very life is at stake, that there is nobody to shield him from serious danger, and that, with Largo anyway, silence is the best policy for survival. Thus he closes his eyes for a second, mentally steeling himself to endure the ultimate ordeal. "What the HELL are you doing?!" Largo bellows fiercely. "Get moving proto, or else you'll get what's coming to you at a premature rate! Oh, whoops. Bugger. I really shouldn't have said that." Largo realises he may have let slip a rather large hint about Guybrush's fate, and also sees that Guybrush is turning round and staring, quite incredulously, at him. "For the last time, get in the hold!" Guybrush feels the sword being jabbed sharply but lightly into his back, and, as he can see no plausible way out of The Nightmare, shuffles forwards with extreme caution to begin the horrific journey to his destiny. He stands anxiously in a corner of the hold, attempting to stay as far away from the porcelain as possible. He closes his eyes again, desperately trying to convince himself this whole affair is just a dream, a fantasy, nothing more. Sufficiently calm, he allows himself to open his eyes a little. Horror upon horror, the porcelain remains, towering over him, glistening grotesquely white, appearing pure, innocent even to the casual observer, but, as sensitive souls know, it hides a secret, a murky and mysterious power so ghastly that it cannot be revealed, at least not now.
Suddenly, the ship lurches and rocks as it begins it's long journey to Monkey Island, and the gigantic pile of porcelain looming over Guybrush sways unsteadily, threatening to topple down on Guybrush at any given time. Guybrush swallows, terrified. His mouth is completely dry, he feels incredibly nauseous, his palms and forehead become encrusted with a cold sweat of total fear, he tries to move, to escape in some way, any way, but he remains rooted to the spot, too petrified to move. As the ship bucks and jumps in the vicious waves of the unfeeling ocean, the porcelain slowly but surely wobbles violently, then collapses with an intense thud and crack on the soiled floor of the hold. It's blatantly obvious what has now happened. It's inevitable, really. Guybrush suddenly begins to feel incredibly faint. He sinks, down, down, down, and into utter darkness and despair. The last thing he hears before passing out completely is Largo's disembodied voice cackle "aha-ha-ha-ha! That pesky little moron is history! And, as I have been so very successful in my task, Lechuck."

Meanwhile, aboard the Sea Cucumber, Elaine pricks up her ears as she hears the racket above deck and, most distinctly, Guy brush stuttering the words "You big old bed wetting doody head", but she does not instantly race above deck to discover what event has occurred to evoke such a, well, wimpy, response. Instead, she puts her head in her hands and sighs. She is unbelievably fed up with her husband's persistently helpless attitude towards being a pirate, and she feels as if she cannot stand to bail Guybrush out once again. She laments on the hopelessness of the situation. "Oh, Guybrush. Honestly, when will he learn to respect other pirates and.. Oh, hi Timmy. Hey, what's the matter boy?" For Elaine's pet monkey, Timmy has been up on deck. He knows his master is in some kind of dire danger, and he has just seen Guybrush being dragged helplessly off the ship. Therefore, he knows he must attract Elaine's attention and encourage her to follow him. He begins to whoop and squeak at Elaine, desperately trying to persuade her to follow him. She gazes down at him looking slightly confused. "Timmy? What on earth is the matter?" she inquires. As if in answer to this question, Guybrush's piercing screams reverberate through the previously quiet and tranquil Carribean. (He's just seen the porcelain!) A deathly silence follows, and only the lap of the waves can be heard. Drowning in a sudden wave of panic and terror, Elaine sprits above deck, only to catch a fleeting glance of the SS Elaine's rapidly fading silhouette on the horizon. Elaine gasps, partly through disbelief, partly through an unnervingly mothering sense of worry for Guybrush. Finally, when she feels able to summon words adeptly, she cries out "Oh my goodness! I've just had a sudden, horrific, yet terribly plausible thought. Could it be that. Lechuck, or one of his minions, has kidnapped my dear Guybrush? " She forcefully pulls herself together, and voicing her thoughts out loud, exclaims "I'd better get back home and try to get some help with this, I think I'm going to need it." Skilfully, she rapidly manuvers the ship into port, and, grabbing a few personal belongings too valuable to be left on the ship, rushes to her mansion, where Grandpa Marley resides.
"Oh, Grandpa!" Elaine sobs emotionally the moment she enters the house.
"What's wrong, sweetheart? I've never seen you like this before." "Grandpa, I don't know for sure, but I'm pretty certain that Guybrush has been kidnapped by Lechuck!" She sinks down onto the nearby chaise lounge, and lies down, a pained, perplexed expression upon her face. "Kidnapped, eh?" says Grandpa, privately relishing the thought of Guybrush never returning. "Well, Elaine, I always thought you were too good for Guybrush. I mean, he was a rather pathetic, amateur pirate, and you, well, you 're Governor of Melee island. So, honey, just forget about Guybrush and find yourself a new man, one who wouldn't be dumb enough to allow himself to be captured in the first place!" Grandpa tries to be subtle in voicing his opinion to Elaine, but he fails miserably, making it quite obvious that he is glad Guybrush has gone. Elaine's face flushes an incensed shade of crimson, and she cries indignantly "GRANDPA! Guybrush is my husband, and I love him more than anything or anyone. He is my one, my only, and so I WOULD APPRICIATE IT IF YOU JUST EITHER HELPED OR LEFT ME ALONE" Elaine drew a sharp intake of breath, and then announced to Grandpa, "Look, Grandpa, I'm going to call up an emergency meeting with my most trusted advisors, seeing as you simply aren't helping this situation, OK?" "Yes, Elaine, that's fine. I didn't mean to be so harsh with you, it's just, well, Guybrush never quite lived up to my expectations as somebody suitable for you. But then, I saw him from a very different perspective to you." HT Marley gently apologises and tries to explain his behaviour. Elaine shakes her head, notangrily this time, but affectionately. "Oh, Grandpa. I understand, And I'M sorry for snapping at you like that. I've really got to phone my advisors now though, alright?" "Yeah, you go and get some help from your girlyfriends." Grandpa relents to Elaine's wishes, although he still retains the firm belief that Guybrush is not worthy of his Grandaughter's love.

Meanwhile, back at Big Whoop, Lechuck, like a schoolboy longing for the summer holidays to finally come, eagerly awaits the arrival of Guybrush and Largo. As he waits, he relates details of the revised plan provided by Largo to his undead crew. "At last" he crows demonically. "I have a plan that simply cannot fail! Nothing can get in my way THIS time, for I can see now that my previous formulae were far too tame and easily foiled, but now. Guybrush is a guaranteed goner!" "Uh, Captain Lechuck sir, how exactly do you plan to execute this new idea?" asks a very practical member of the crew. "Argh, I be glad that you asked that question," drawled Lechuck. "Ye see, the new plan entails a certain degree of voodoo magic to be executed successfully, and, as luck would have it, Largo informs me that since we separated, he has been learning an ancient, sacred and immensely powerful form of voodoo from what he referred to as 'a mysterious figure', whoever that would be. Now Largo is an expert in the art of voodoo, and so preparation for the new plan may begin. Now I'll tell ye about the juicy bit, the purest form of revenge in existence." Lechuck can barely conceal his excitement. "We are going to kill Guybrush Threepwood so that I may take his life and, with the help of a complex voodoo spell, I SHALL RETURN!!! And even more wonderful, I will become a mortal." " Uh, sir.." ventured one soldier. "Isn't becoming mortal kind of a bad thing, because, well, you can kind of die?!" "Ah, yes, that IS a risk, but hopefully, in my mortal guise, Elaine will finally be wooed by me. Right, now, a little less conversation, a little more action now! First, remove the gold cage from over the portal. We probably won't be needing that at all anymore. unless Elaine refuses to comply with my demands." Lechuck is interrupted by Agley, jogging triumphantly into the lair. "Well, sir," Agley says briskly, addressing Lechuck (obviously!) " Largo has returned, with Guybrush, I'm glad to say." Lechuck turnsaway slightly, a dark shadow passing slightly over his transparent face, a faint secret smile on his lips as he mutters the word "Ex-cellent" (A la Charles Montgomery Burns) He turns back to face Agley and declares "Well, don't just stand there! Bring that poor misguided fool to me!" "D'ya mean Largo?" enquired Agley. "NO, I DO NOT MEAN LARGO, BRING GUYBRUSH TO ME THIS INSTANT!!!!!" bellows Lechuck furiously. "Honestly, employees today.."


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